Honey 2 (2011)Thursday, 5. April 2012
Maria (Kat Graham) was just released from juvie and released into foster care. Taking care of her is Connie (Lonette McKee) who owns a dance studio, where Maria works off her community service and tries to keep herself out of trouble. But Maria’s ex Luis (Christopher ‘War’ Martinez) – who got her into trouble in the first place – wants to have her back in his dance crew, the 718s. Maria declines, joins up with Brandon (Randy Wayne) and his crew and they try to beat the 718s at a dance battle.
Oh boy. Honey 2 might be, officially, the worst dance film in the history of dance films (which is saying a lot in a genre that has one and a half storylines and usually puts dancing abilities way over acting abilities). It is certainly the worst dance film I’ve ever seen.
I’ve seen my share of dance movies. I like dance movies. I know what to expect: flat storylines, flatter characters, the weirdest clothing, nice-but-generic beats (on rare occasions even good beats), a message of underdogs and endurance. And all of that made bearable by pretty awesome dancing and really cool choreographies.
And that’s where Honey 2 falls completely apart: the dancing. The choreographies are not impressive, they’re for intermediaries at best. And when “our” crew goes ahead and wins every dance competition (unless it doesn’t really have any consequences), even against dance crews like Quest… Look, it’s just pathetic.
I was lucky enough to watch this with other dance-movie-savvy people and a lot of alcohol and we just decided to make a drink game out of it. If we had had a dance movie bingo card (and could somebody please get on this straight away – we obviously need it), we would have had Bingo within minutes – from the interracial couple to the ex in the other crew, from the betrayal of one of the crew members to the mash-ups, it’s all there.
But if I hadn’t had any of this, I’m pretty sure I wouldn’t have seen this film to the end. Because apart from its drinking game properties, it just has no redeeming features whatsoever.
Summarising: depends on whether you want to get drunk quickly or not. If yes, you found the ideal film.